Abortion, sorrow.

Actually wanted to blog a long post but due to time constraints...
Today had sci lesson and ms chee showed us the video on abortion
Hui Shi and kor had already prepared me for the "gruesomeness" of the video so i thot it'll b ok...
But as i watched the video, this sorrow just came from within me..
I had thought about past incidents.. So as the guy in the video was talking, i was like trying not to cry but failing... So by the time the video ended, I was like couldn't talk otherwise i'll cry somemore.. Then ms chee was like "if any1 feels uncomfortable after watching this video, u can come and talk to me." Then she came over to me and asked if i was alright. Nice of her but i just can't talk to her.. Asked Glo to just help me fend off comments and just escaped to the balcony.
But heard Lim Yu saying "This is all propaganda.." I don't know mayb i was too emotional but she was lucky i didn't go over and slap her or tell her to shut up... Those who know me know i'm hardly that angry but Lim Yu was lucky... When she laughed during the video, i was already quite upset at her and also bcos of bad memories...
Went to the balcony and just cried the pain out and sang christian songs and asked God to give me strength but still I couldn't help but feel upset... Thought I was strong enough and had put the past behind me but now, I realized the truth... Still am very emotional when it comes to this topic... But thanks to Glo, Shao and Hui Shi who cheered me up and comforted me, i stopped crying but it still hurt inside... Thanks Shao for making me laugh! =) decided to go venezia to cheer myself up and then even went to 7 eleven after that for slurpee but when I came back, I knew that i was still upset, just not showing it...
God, I know that there was a reason for what happened but please, I need you to give me the strength. I just can't survive through science, especially for this topic..
Those reading this, i'm choosing not to put the content of the video down cos there's no point. Refer to gan jie's blog... Cos if i write anymore, I'll break down again...
Gtg now. Rush out hw, where got the mood???