heavy heart

On friday night/saturday morning, I blogged about how I was looking foward to service and hearing from God. It's time to blog about yesterday.


It was certainly a change to see everyone in their school uniforms. Heehee. I really should start tying my own tie? =p Anyway, worship for me wasn't anything spectacular, in the sense that I didn't feel like I was in God's presence yet. The sermon was very relevant though. Mhmm. Vision mandate: A generation of faith! For today, I'll not blog about the sermon as that wasn't really the highlight of the service for me yesterday.


Altar call. Even before I went up, I could sense that there was going to be a change in me. For some reason, tears came to my eyes as I thought of a certain person. I still have no idea how to phrase what happened when I was up at the altar. The experience was really different. It was nothing obvious like being struck down onto the floor. But rather, something changed internally. Reason for my title? That was kind of what happened. I don't mean that my heart suddenly weighs more but rather, my heart is feeling heavier. God placed upon me a renewed desire to see souls saved for Him, this new compassion for people. And because of that, my heart's heavier seeing those that I love not receiving God yet. That was why I was crying and just asking God to let me stand in the gap between Him and them. After that, ended off service by singing "History Maker". How appropriate?


Just feel like blogging more about what went through my mind and all yesterday. Before yesterday, I did want to see my friends come to know God and hopefully attend service along with me. But after yesterday's altar call, it's no longer just a matter of wanting. It's so much more than that. It's really this burning desire to see several ones of you saved. And in particular, there's one name that God has spoken to me about. And throughout F.U.E.L, that name never stopped flashing in my head. So many little things would make me think of wanting to see that person in church. And throughout the course of blogging this entry, my heart is still feeling so heavy, as if there's an additional "burden". But this "burden" is something I'm willing to bear. I just pray that one day, preferably soon, those that I love and care for will come to know God.


~keeping you all in prayer~