Hyperness

Yay! Exams are over! For me, at least. To all the literature people, jia you! But then again, most of you don't read my blog..
Okie. Let's see, I've been extremely hyper and happy since I handed up the bio paper to Mr Andrew. Was getting restless in my seat while waiting to be dismissed. Came out of the hall with a large smile plastered on my face and I think Renee was being highly amused (yet again...) by me. Anyway, Renee's mum was nice enough to give me a lift to HPPS so I reached there earlier than expected. =)

Ok... Time to blog extensively about the time I spent there? Haha. Was asked about life in NUS High and considering it's a mixed school, the teachers had to make some comments. But I enjoyed chatting with the teachers and was helping Mrs Idil with some files. Quite relaxing to do such simple stuff... Laadeedaa. Then talked to Ms Tai and complained about Chinese in Chinese... Blushed quite a bit. Haha. Somehow, I can't figure out why I seem ego in front of people but when compliments are given (as in genuine ones), I don't really think it's accurate. Yeps. Then from 12 - 12:30, the teachers all had lessons so I was walking around the school and talking on the phone with sammi. Thanks sammi. =) Then continued talking with Mrs Idil and got a free cup of watermelon juice. -slurps- After that, talked to Ms Ng. Ahh. How much I miss talking to the teachers. The topics can range from the past to the present to the future... Yeps. The usual advice from teachers and all. Got chased off at around 2pm cause Ms Ng had to mark compositions. Oh well. Just in time to rush off for piano. Anyway, realized that I spent 3 hrs at HPPS. Not bad...

Piano lesson. Ah. I knew changing teacher was a good idea. =) Anyway, my teacher was understanding about the lack of practice. Whew... Oh ya. Got a task from my teacher to figure out the melody of a Jay Chou song. I feel accomplished! Figured out the song by playing around on the piano and listening to the song countless times... Yay! Shall try that for other songs as well. Maybe tomorrow? Whee! Hyperness. Anyway, here's my programme for the next few days... Go out with auntie and cousin aka piano teacher tomorrow. Thursday, slack at home and Renee's coming over. Yay! Haha. Friday's free for now... The nice thing about marking days... =) That's all for now. Whee! Laadeedaa.

Sleepless night

Ack. My thoughts are all over. Before I start blogging, I'll be really random and blog a recount of last night from 10:15 til the time I fell asleep. Considering that Renee got pretty tickled and amused by it... Laadeedaa. Erm. Got chased to bed by mum so couldn't finish reading the book Mel lent me. Laid down on my bed with my MP3 player on and just tossed and turned for about 30 minutes thinking about everything under the sun. Ok, not really but was thinking about a lot of things. I'll blog about some of them later. Couldn't sleep so sent a few random messages. Turned off my MP3 player. Tossed and turned for about 20 minutes more while trying to fall asleep using various methods like counting sheeps (which didn't work...) and then start thinking of songs in my head (which brought back too much memories but worked...) and eventually fell asleep. Let's see... I can even tell how soon I dozed off cause I don't remember finishing the lyrics of "I lay my love on you"... Laadeedaa. Isn't it nice how I can blog one paragraph on something so trivial? Haha. Anyway, finally fell asleep slightly before 11:30. Pft. I was supposed to be asleep by 10:30... Bah. Overslept this morning.

Anyway, back to the main reason for blogging. Hopefully, blogging helps me get my thoughts in line and so I can doze off faster tonight... By the way, most of what I was thinking all involved relationships and all but with the various groups of people in my life. Firstly, parents. Erm. For some reason, I didn't get my mum anything for Mother's Day this year. It's like unthinkable, I know but still, don't know what got into me and all. Ya, go ahead and start "tsk-ing" me. But I'm still trying to figure out why I didn't get her anything. It's not that I forgot about Mother's Day. I did think of various gift ideas but it wasn't practical or way out of my budget. Then in the end, it's like resignation. Can't think of anything and I guessed I was too busy with other things to even make a card. Hmm. Things have changed. More than I ever expected. Ack. I just can't blog openly... Hmm. Sorry if this seems like a cliffhanger.

Ok... Time to change topic and see if it helps. Oh ya, only one more paper to go! =) Had chemistry and chinese today. Hmm. I got to admit that the comprehension passage was fun to do... The content was especially intersting and thought-provoking. The passage was on marriage. Ever wondered why you never read about life after marriage in fairytales? Think about it... There was also a line on how marriage seems to lead to the "death" of love but people still get married. The small anecdote in the passage was one of those touching recount of how the author saw an old couple taking care of each other and how that made him realize that love is found in the most common everyday thing and is not always expressed about sweet-nothings, romantic gestures, etc... (By the way, it sounds way nicer in chinese. Maybe I'll type it out one day in chinese...) Hmm. The small things in life mean so much. Not just in relationships between couples but also between people. And so for that, thanks Jeann for remembering that my last paper's tomorrow and smsing me well wishes. =)

There's one more thing that I want to blog about. It's been on my mind for close to a week and was one of the various things that I was thinking about yesterday... Ack. It's one of those topics I rather not face and don't like blogging openly about. Erm. Hope whoever actually reads my blog entry don't mind if I'm being vague. Anyway, after something took place, the situation just hit me. I've been coping with it and was getting used to it but how real and the degree of change was just a bit overwhelming. I had placed too much expectations on that and right now, I'm seriously let down. I was the one that you all were worried about, worried about how I would change in a new school. Ya, I admit I've changed but I kept my word. I didn't let go of who I am. Ironic how the situation changed because of you. Urk. I'm not making sense cause everything's too vague but if I blog in detail, it'll lead to consequences that I'm not ready to deal with yet. But no matter how the situation has changed and no matter how I'm feeling about that, at least you seem happier and you have them to be there for you so I think I'm going to let go more than ever... Reluctantly. But still, I think I got to. Unless things change and you make the first move once more...

Laadeedaa. Nope, I'm not being moody by the way. I just need to let this out... Yeps.

My nice mei. =)

Due to the fact that both of us are extremely bored, we shall devote an entry to each other.
(I am making too many dedications.. Sighs?)

Hmm. Renee is my nice, nice mei who is always nice to me (unlike some people...) Haha. She claims I'm influencing her. Laadeedaa. Am I? Ok. Let's see. Erm... She just told me that thanks to me, she talks on the phone more! Haha. I broke her previous record and it's right now 2 hrs! Oh. I like studying on the phone with her! I actually remember stuff from those calls.

Yay! She's another person who can stand my hyperness and randomness. Trust me, she has to put up with a lot of that.. She's getting influenced by my craziness. She claims she's getting crazier too!

Ok... Shall end it now. We're just doing this cause we're bored and want to destress from Chem. And btw, we're not les.

Yesterday. (I'm running out of ideas.)

Sammi came to church yesterday! Lol. Actually, it's no longer as shocking as it would have been. Erm. Sermon was on Da Vinci Code. That's about it. FUEL was vaguely amusing. Mel, stop sabo-ing me, can? Pft. Dinner. Erm. Surprisingly lack of appetite. Was only thirsty and craving for ice cream and famous amos cookies. =) ReversO + Very Berry is nice! -slurps- Erm. Truth or dare is one of the worst games that can be played in public. -pokes the evil person who suggested playing the game ytd- Laadeedaa. Pft. The dare I had to do was erm... embarrassing. But relatively safer compared to the other options?! Like erm. Sammi and Mel, we were in public?! Pft. Laadeedaa. I think sammi enjoyed her dares though. Hmm. Sighs. I realized we like to ask questions that involve choosing the "lesser of two evils"... Like pick between ... and ... Laadeedaa. Sighs. The only nice thing I got out of yesterday was like I got to borrow one book each from sammi and mel. Thanks. =) Shall start on the books after I'm done with revision. Don't think I'm in the mood for blogging so didn't blog in detail and all. Leave a tag if you want me to edit this entry... Laadeedaa. But then again, most people only leave tags saying that I'm scandalous. Pft.

Apology

Hmm. I guess I'm feeling bad for smsing a few people last night/this morning when I couldn't sleep and disturbing you all. Sorry. People like sammi were awake and had to actually bear with me ranting... And of course, one or two others had to bear with me on MSN. So sorry. That's all.

Exams

It's that time of mugging once more. Ack. Ok... I'm getting too critical of my writing style. Edited the introduction twice already. I shall just not bother about the style and write normally. Taking the English exam today was enough. Blogging's meant to help me settle down and just relax, not make my mind active. At least, not now...

Anyway, for those who don't know, I'm going through my mid-years now except that it isn't really a mid-year examination. My mid-year = end of years? Considering that my school operates on a 6 monthly modular system so each module ends after 6 months. But surprisingly, I'm not as stressed out now compared to when I was preparing for eoys last year. I wonder why... Before I continue, I must thank my nice mei, Renee, who studies over the phone with me for like all the subjects? Haha. We covered all the math modules, physics, bio and even english over the phone for the past few days. =) And yet another realization: Revision can actually be done effectively over the phone! Mei, we so rock! Haha. But it helps to study over the phone and go through the questions together.

Just had my first few major papers today. English, Physics, Polynomial Equations and Functions. Erm. English was ok, I guess? But I did leave some questions unanswered. Lack of time. But it shouldn't affect my marks that badly, I hope. Physics. Erm... Ok. This is the really sad part. It was an open book examination which means we could bring in one piece of A4 paper with anything we want written on it. And yet, I think I'll still fail the examination. Though someone said that I shouldn't just be aiming to pass, for physics, passing means a lot to me already. To make up for the dismal performance in physics, I did try aiming high for other modules.

Then came Polynomial Equations and Functions. Erm. I would probably get a B grade or so? But that's really falling short of my aim. I was aiming for 90% in my exam so that I can pull up my overall grade to A- but now, I really doubt it. Oh well, time to look foward to the next few exams. Matrices and Coordinate Geometry tomorrow. Though I used to think I shouldn't aim high as it'll just hurt more when you fall, I shall dare to aim high for once. Only for one math module do I care to aim for a overall 90 grade. Matrices. As long as I'm careful, I know I can achieve that. -blinks- When did I actually begin to have confidence in myself? Especially when it came to academic grades. -shrugs- We'll see how things go. All the best to everyone! =)

That missing piece of the puzzle

Well, my current blogskin doesn't show the title of my entry which is both good and bad, I guess. This time, the title's too much of a giveaway to what I want to write about and we can't have that, can we? Considering that I have every intention of making this blog entry as vague as possible. So ya... Let's see if I can do that.

Let's see. Service. The sermon didn't really speak out to me but rather, it was the time when we were supposed to just close our eyes and listen for God's voice. This image was constantly in my mind. Then altar call. I didn't go up cause I didn't really fit into any of the groups. But in my seat, I was being touched by God. The song "Rescue". Mel or isaac, if you have that song, can send to me next time? Hmm. Realization, that I was so close to repeating the process of last year. Moodiness, depression, tears. Letting go of some things. I've never been good at letting go. Still aren't. But it's like the list just got longer. Relationships, emotions, etc...

FUEL. Erm... Sad that I had to leave half-way. Then when making my way to dinner, I was like calling up people and asking them to call with me on the phone. Thanks Renee and Glo. =) But ya. Even the wanting to talk to someone was telling. It made me realized... Oh well. Dinner. Erm... Felt out of place? Never did like eating in such an enviroment. Doesn't suit me? Anyway, after dinner, went to check out some "Hark Music Cafe". Cousin was having her ROM there. As the name implies, it's cafe with a stage. For karaoke purposes? Anyway, the whole family was just sitting there stoning. I was no exception. Hmm. Then I started thinking... Erm. Ya. The same thing that I realized just now? Ouch. It came back and hit me on the head again. So ya... Not good. Anyway, have I mentioned that it's actually relaxing to stare at the flame of a candle? Haha. Was playing with the camera in my phone and took a picture of the flame emitting blue light. =) Whee!

Sighs. I think I've still not covered what I want to but I think I rather not. Sighs. This entry doesn't make much sense, right?

Today - mood swings (?)

For a lack of a better title, I just picked "Today". Considering that this blog entry will just be about what happened so far today which isn't much really, I can't find a title to cover what I'm going to write about.

It was raining in the morning! I wanted to stand in the rain but for practical reasons and violent objections from sylvie and renee. Sighs. Assembly was in 10 minutes and besides my top is white (colour of my school uniform...)
Had my first exam paper today. Higher Chinese Paper 1. I never did consider paper 1 (english or chinese doesn't matter) as an exam so there wasn't any reason to be nervous. Hmm. I guessed I kind of went crazy and picked the one question I shouldn't have picked? For those who don't know, there are three kinds of questions for the essay.

1) Narrative
2) Exposition
3) Commenting on newspaper article.

The one kind of questions that teachers told us not to do was -insert drum roll- exposition. This round, I was trying to decide between exposition and the commenting on a newpaper article. Let's see. It was either writing on the generation gap between parents and their children or writing my opinion on the recent dialogue session between Lee Kuan Yew and those young adults. Though I had points for both topics, I was really inclined towards the exposition so erm... I kind of threw common sense out of the examination hall and did the topic that I wanted. I think it's probably going to cost me my marks but erm. I don't think I'll regret it. It was just so fun writing about that topic. When I refer to doing an exam paper as "fun", it's safe to say I'm a bit abnormal. As in even weirder than my normal self. Haha.

Ok. Anyway, after that was just lunch and 3 hour of bridging modules. Hmm. I found out my CA grade for coordinate geometry. Need to do way better for my exam paper. I want to put my marks up to above average at the very least. After that, was going home alone. Sorry sylvie, I guessed I wasn't in the mood to go West Mall and all. I was doing sudoku on the bus. *faints* Yeps. I was kind of shocked when I realized that but it was nice to just be focused on something and not stone.

Reached home and erm... slacked. Ya. I really should be mugging but I realized I mug best at night. So I'm slacking now til after dinner? But anyway, was trying to complete the sudoku puzzle. Failed. Never mind. It was still an accomplishment for me as I managed to fill it up a bit more. Anyway, started reading this story on fictionpress. Sammi, your recommendations are good. Hmm. Read "When you own the universe". Erm. What is it with me and getting so caught up in fictional stories? I constantly talk to the television screen, criticizing the characters or when reading fictionpress, I tend to empathize with the characters too much that I get a bit emotional? Oops? Thought about some things when reading the story. Erm. Ya. Why am I blogging this again? Oh ya... Cos I'm actually in the mood too for once to blog something proper. That's all for now.

Scandals

People are attracted to scandals. I guess it's fairly obvious in society and all. Look at all the media attention that celebraties get when they get into anything scandalous. And the reason behind people liking to gossip? Similar reasons, I guess. Anyway, this part of the entry was prompted by the sudden increase in tags on my tagboard ever since recently when a few of my entries became more "scandalous". At least, that must be how it seems. Hmm. I can't say that I'm happy or upset over this link between the content of my entry to the amount of people tagging. Though the number of tags is not always related to the number of visitors to a blog, I still think I'll be right if I say that people visit blogs more when the "scandal" level of the blog is nice.

Why do people visit other's blogs? Boredom? Finding information? Wanting to know what goes on? Amusement/Entertainment? Hmm. For me, I guess the blogs I visit the most often are the blogs of people who I actually care more about and I want to know what I'm missing out on in their lives or what they're thinking about, so on and so forth. Based on that, I've got to admit I don't go regularly to many people's blogs. Only those few. Hmm. You should know who you people are? I think it's fairly obvious. But anyway, the list of blogs that I go to regularly seems to have changed a bit just over these past months. Interesting...

Congratulations

Pft. Congrats to the first two members of ACFC. You've done your job extremely well and the damage has been done. But I've got to admit, in between the times of frustration and trying to answer all the questions from various people, I'm getting amused too. Oh well.

Dedicated to you. =)

Since you asked and me being nice and all, I shall dedicate this whole entry to you and er... ya, just write about you. =)
Hmm. It's been a short time since I started to know you, as in talk to you and all. Not just aware that you exist. Haha. Anyway, how have you impacted me/influenced me?
Ok. For some weird reason, I can't seem to write. Writer's block. Probably due to my reluctance to write about this on my blog.
Well, one of the impact's that fine system that you implemented... Pft. It cost me like $4 already, rite? Oh well. At least I haven't had to pay for the past 1+ months. Hmm. That really helps when it comes to controlling my mood. And er ya... Dunno if you remember the one MSN conv we had and you were kind of telling me off? The one when I was moody and all... A while after I got comissioned, I think. Yep. Anyway, your words kind of stuck. One of the few reasons why I'm probably less moody?
Oh ya. You're very nice. =) Shaln't bother elaborating on this though. And your tolerance level for randomness's quite high. =) That's why it's so fun to sms random things to you. You make me smile and laugh a lot. Yeps. That's one of the biggest impact. Hmm... I really can't think of what to write. Ok... Corrections: I know but I just can't seem to put it into words. If you really want, let you read my notebook next time? Sorry darling. This's all I can write for now. =p

Looking back.

Looking back was never advisable for me. I'll just remember all the pain and hurt that I went through. But I realized on saturday that what didn't kill me made me stronger. Eventually.
Today, during A.C.E, I couldn't help but smirk at the part when Ms Flo said how eventually reflection becomes part of your life, like when you hear a song or read a book. How right. Every thing I do, I start to think about it and reflect. But I no longer reflect in the same way as last year. Last year, reflection = moodiness.
And also, the thing about how only you've been through some sadness, then you'll enjoy happiness. I guess I finally learned how to stop filling that void inside me with moodiness like how I did last year. Sadness and depression were reliable... They filled me up. But not with meaning. This year, that void's filled with happiness at how things are. I treasure each time that I laugh and have fun. And it helps. The amount of time I was moody last year this time is almost equal to the number of times I am happy now. Which shows the distinct improvement.
As to what happened last year, well, what has passed has passed. I don't think that I've regreted what I've done though. Given the choice, would I still do the same thing and go through all the misunderstandings again? I guess I would. That was partly what formed me and our friendship. If you read this, I guess I just want to thank you for being you. Ya, we've been through too many downs but somehow, we always reached the ups once more. Now, I'm going through my ups without you. Hope you're doing as well. I won't know. We've drifted. And it takes too much effort to hold on now. I want to but I got too tired. I learned it the hard way that I've got to let go. Things have changed. So have we.

Recap of saturday.

Sammi reminded me that I didn't blog about westside story and that day... Oops. My apologies. Anyway, that way was hectic and consisted of rushing from one place to another and the best part was I enjoyed every minute of it. Here's how the schedule was like:
9:30 am - 11:30am : Chemistry tutorial
1:30 pm - 4:40 pm : Meet Sis Serena in church to catch up and all followed by service
5:00 pm - Went IMM to support Jonathan in "Cutest kid competition"
7:30 pm - Meet Sammi at Esplanade to watch "Westside Story"
Yes, I'm aware that there are some gaps in times, those times were probably the travelling time.
Hmm. To go into more detail about the day, I guess I'll focus on the last event. Going out with sammi. Even though everything was finalized the night before and was really rushed and last-minute, I can say that I really enjoyed chatting with her and all. It triggered off this thought/realization that I had: "This friendship not only lasted beyond what I expected, but it's probably going to be one of my most lasting friendships, and maybe even longer than some other friendships that I thought would last forever." I rather not go into detail and all but I guess life's just full of the unexpected things. Some things I thought I'll lose, I regained it. Some things I thought I'll have forever, I lost it almost instantaneously.
Anyway, just talking to her was a nice experience. Haven't spent much quality time with her instead of just over the phone. Sammi, I owe you so many more "outings". I'll try my best to get permission for the one thing we both want most, ok? Lol. And ya, we're both booked for Grease, ok? Thanks for inviting me for Westside Story. =)

A new beginning?

Hmm... Realized that in many times, the past few months have been nothing like Sec 1 and 2 but rather, a repeat of primary school? Lol. With a few changes, of course.
But it's like I've started to enjoy studying again. Ya sure, I complain about the workload a lot but I'm actually finding school fun. It's like this whole new beginning. And of course, there are other things that have changed a lot from last year. So many things...
But hmm. To put it simply, I feel like I'm reliving the joy and innocence of childhood again. I'm still able to smile and enjoy life without being that cynical or sarcastic. It's as if the previous two years never happened...

Oh well, I've been wanting to blog about this for a while but circumstances never permitted. But now, when I blog, it's such a short entry... Haha. Maybe another time?

Amusement

Yesterday was interesting, to put it mildly...
Went over to sylvie's house to do physics airlift assignment, or at least attempted to. Sawing wood is fun! Lol.
Anyway, after that was the mad rush from her house to mine and then to sammi's house. I left sylvie's house at 4:40 and went home, bathed, pack my bag and rushed to sammi's house by 6. Not bad... At sammi's hse, I was amusing her, I guess. Took a taxi down to church cause we lost track of time at her house? Lol. Coincidences? Interesting who the first 3 people we saw were. Anyway, lots of shocks, etc. Sammi being evil and being very amused. During doctor's journal, I was stuck between two people who are part of the ACFC. And one of them's like the president of ACFC?! -blinks-
Supper! Being bullied. Sammi, you're supposed to be on my side!
-blinks- why am I even blogging about this in the first place? Oh well... Time to get back to work. Anyway, yesterday was amusing and I digged my own grave so many times too. Haiz.

100th post

Never thought this blog will last so long. My 100th entry! This blog was started at the end of 2004, after I came back from Youth Camp. In the 1+ year that has passed, this blog has recorded so much of what happened. My various mood swings, the more interesting and memorable events that have occured throughout last year and part of this year has been recorded down. How much things have changed... What I tagged on gan jie's blog and what her entry was about just reminds me so much of everything. I'm really too sentimental.
Anyway, I realized that I'm reading too much again... I know I've blogged about that but time to get even more specific. When I was young, the fiction books were always some fantasy/action books. But now, the genre has changed to romance and stuff like that. Why the "stuff like that"? Well, it's cause I don't specifically go for romance books but the books that I've been reading talks about many issues in life that I've always tried to avoid. Relationships, love, life, death, memory, etc. These topics have always tend to make me more "reflective" which used to equal moodiness. But now, I'm coping better, I guess. I get reflective and just think about what I've read but the moodiness doesn't come that badly anymore. But anyway, so many quotes and phrases that I really like... Hmm.
I really want to blog and write on every single phrase that I like from the books that I've read but it just doesn't seem appropriate. Don't ask me why, I have no idea myself... Even the play "A Beautiful Companion" and that whole night, there were so many things that I was thinking about but I just can't seem to put them down into words. But as I said, so many things have changed yet so many things stay the same. And somehow, all my reflections and all always seem to revolve around the same few things/people... Oh well.

Unspoken but written...

1. list 10 things you want to say to 10 people but know you never will
2. don't say who they are
3. never discuss it again
[Took this from gan jie's blog... Abt condition no 1, I'm not so sure about the "never" part but it's probably just highly unlikely. Anyway, some of the people might seem obvious but don't even ask me anything... Refer to condition 3. So here goes...]

1. Have you even realized how much hurt and damage you have caused? It's been a chore to talk to you, to even be civil. But society and my own conscience refuses to let me cut off all ties with you, I guess. I do feel guilty at times but you don't even make a move to mend this gap that just increases with time.

2. You're one of the few people that I felt influenced me quite a significant bit over the time I knew you. How do I say this? It was such a joy and such a pain to know you. Pain, the experience of interacting with you grew tiring but joy, the friendship that we shared just couldn't be compared. Although I'm emotional, I willingly opened up to you more. Compared to others who only knew me through their analysis. I opened up to you. Thanks for being there. But now. I have this question that I hate to ask but it just bothers me, "Would things have turned out better if we didn't know each other?" Less joy but also less hurt. Anywyay, Thanks. I'll try my best to still always be there. That, I promise.

3. Urk. Stop pretending! I don't believe that you're really who you seem to be. You're not. And we all know it so just be yourself for real. So who cares if it's a weaker side of you? So what? I want to know you for who you are. It's been a while since I first knew you but you're still hiding behind the mask.

4. Hmm... Never thought that I'll be writing this to you. But anyway, a small incident long time ago made me feel really bad and guilty. You used to care about me but I kept crushing all your hope and rejecting you. Sorry. It might seem like an excuse but that was my natural reflex. Sorry. When you told me one day that you used to care, I was feeling bad. I don't think you'll remember this incident but anyway, sorry for putting you down so many times.

5. You. Thanks. How many times I want to repeat that? I don't know... But I don't know. I really feel like there's so much to thank you for. Even things that seem insignificant, they made me smile. So ya... Thanks. Heehee. Actually, there's more I want to say but I rather not type it out... =p I don't think anyone will notices this part that's added on... But now, I guess I'll just type it out. I've always been too emotional and feel too much, concerning myself so much when other people have problems. Especially if they're close to me, once they get down, I get affected. You're one of those who I care more about... So it really hurts when you're down and I just feel so helpless cause I don't know how to cheer you up, to bring a smile to your face. I'm not the person for that job, I'm just not the one who can cheer you up. But why do I still try?

6 - 10. I can't think of anyone yet... Heehee... So that's all for now.

If anything sounded a bit more moody than usual, I apologize. I just finished reading a book before that and normally, after reading a mood, I'm a bit too reflective and think too much about the past... =p

Pft...

Ok. I knew it wasn't a smart move to put that Mel's hotter and cuter than Isaac so now, I'm kind of "forced" to write something else. Here goes:
Isaac is hotter and sexier than melanie.
Pft. Done...

Interactions

Friends. That has always been one issue I'm too concerned about.
Anyway, there have been various things that just summarize the state of my various friendships with different groups of people..
Thursday, sylvie came over to my house and we just did our homework and then watched "Pride and Prejudice". Quote: "Goddess Divine". Rofl... But ya, the few hours was mostly quite relaxing and just filled with laughter and random stuff...
Friday, going back to Nanyang. Hmm... Gloria has always been able to read me well. -shrugs- Anyway, I realized how much I was still clinging on to things that I should let go... I'll elaborate more on it later... Oh ya, going to Orchard. Some memories that I hold dear.
Anyway, after that, met up with Melanie... Dinner before Lcell... Lots of laughter and random things and getting traumatized. Oh ya, I promise Mel something... Here goes. Melanie is cuter (minus ugly) and hotter than Isaac! But the best part was we got it wrong... There wasn't lcell. So went to Island Creamery. Anyway, that was for Friday.
Saturday, service... Ouch. The one image that's constantly been in my head for the past few services is the idea of two ropes being connected but then it's cut through... The ropes are only connected by a few strands... The thing is, I've to cut away those strands and it'll hurt... I'm purposely being vague by the way... It's quite obvious though what I'm talking about. Fuel... Hmm. Ouch. Trials. Brother Andy sharing his story... It touched my heart... How true. Even though I thought that I've forgiven and the bitterness and pain is no longer there, each time, the tears flow again. Dinner. Hmm. More amusement and I'm kind of surprised by how things have turned out... Anyway, on the bus trip back, was talking to Sammi on the phone... It struck me how our friendship lasted even after Primary 6, something that was kind of unexpected...
Oh well... To put it simply, the friendship with my friends from various groups... HPPS, NY, NUSHS and church... The situation right now is really unexpected... in a good way and in a bad...

Ok. That's enough of reflecting... And now, I'm getting exploited by Sammi! -sulks- I'm probably going to help her with lit homework... Dots... Pft.. Time to stop blogging and help her...

Books... world of my own.

Recently, I've gone back to reading a lot, or at least more than the past few months.

Since young, I've "devoured" books by the dozen but after primary 6, I've stopped reading as much. Or at least, I haven't just sat down and concentrate on reading. Til recently. Been making weekly trips to JE regional library and spending 1 hr there each time, just browsing or actually reading. Anyway, been finding some nice books to read, those kind that just make me tune out everything and I just can't stop reading and can't bear to put the book down. How to know I'm crazy over that book? When I stay up way beyond my bedtime and turn on my bedside light just to read... Found some lines in one of the latest books I read that were so touching and so meaningful that I actually saved it down...

Then, my latest craze... Books written by this author zhang xiao xian... Yes. Chinese books written by this author. The one I'm reading and enjoying right now is "Ba tian tang huan gei wo"... Direct translation: Return heaven to me. The book's actually a lot of short essays/pieces on various topics compiled together... Most of them touch on the affairs of the heart and relationships, etc... Maybe when I'm free, I'll translate some over to English and post them on my blog... I wanted to do a reflection of what I've read so far from that book in this blog but decided against it. Maybe some other time?